May 16, 2001
8:42A
REAL LIFE, REAL WEB

So sad that Kaycee has passed away. Her last entries just reverberated with light and life. I had to call Honey at work and tell him how much I loved him. I had to throw open the windows, feel the morning sun, and listen to that noisy bluejay squawking on the fence. I had to despite it being so painfully beautiful that it cut my heart. One of those double-edged moments in time.

May 10, 2001
2:04P
PEACEFUL INTERLUDE

It's Friday afternoon. The window box fan is humming, the wind chimes are chiming, and I'm letting sleeping dogs lie.

Just had lunch with Miz Liz at the new Yahoo building in Funnyvale. It was really tough not breaking down while watching all those people in the cafeteria who had *jobs*, but I kept it together. The free double cafe mocha helped with that stiff upper lip thing.

I've already finished erecting and QA'ing my holey haven. Thought it would take all weekend, so I'm out of school early. So nice to have every single page all HTML 4.01 and CSS2. And my ya-ya's are now calm and I no longer have the urge to blurt out every sexual opinion I have in my head here on this page.

Hope to get some rest this weekend as I have been burning it on both ends. The stress of no job has been incredibly draining. I don't know where to put my head between balancing the staying positive ("something will come up") and the facing of a reality without doing Web Design professionally ("how's your Microsoft Office skills"). What are those stages of grief again? Whatever they are, I'm right in the middle of one of them.

You see, I totally love doing Web Design. It's not like work. I've done work. I've been a janitor at an elementary school, a beer waitress at a honky-tonk, a canoe float trip guide at a vacation spot, a secretary at a halfway house for alcoholic men, a waitress at a country club, a computer operator at a test systems company, a clerk at Wal-Marts,...and every single job was WORK. Well, the canoe float trip guide wasn't so much work, but I did have to wash all of the buses too and that was work. Enough moaning! I'm depressing myself.

May is National Masturbation Month. Go out and haul your own ashes.

May 7, 2001
1:08P
THE HOLEY HUNTER

Heartless now has a new playground for her ya-ya's. Hopefully I'll complete the move by the end of the week.

Big thanks to the ever-lovely Erica of BeHosting.com for making the transition so smooth and so fast!

I have to admit to being relieved at having a place for my holey chit-chat again. When I deactivated Heartless's Holey Haven a couple of months ago, I was surprised at how deprived I felt—a female site and my only sex pages were of penises. Where's the balance in that? But now I have a safe place to discuss sex from Her POV without future employers being none the wiser. Talk about having my cake and eating it too.

As some are pushing for May to be porn free, I thought it only appropriate that I laugh in their faces all May and the other 11 months too with my new weblog just for sex, erotica, and adult humor: The Holey Hunter.

Oooo, look at the goosebumps!

May 3, 2001
2:44P
NICE PICTURES

Received some wink-wink-nudge-nudge things today. One was a lovely book, I Am My Lover (edited by Joani Blank of Good Vibes). WooHoo! Here's the '98 Cleansheets review from Mary Anne Mohanraj.

Bianca's Shack is shutting down. Awww... Here's Wired's article: Shut the Smut Shack. Geez wasn't it just yesterday that Bianca's was being sued by another shack.

End of dot-com doom was just the eye of the storm. Related: Dead Dot-Coms Pile up in April. But from AskTog, let's keep this thing in Internet Perspective, shall we.

Others are trying to get by in the Bay Area.

A bright spot: Bill Moyers, the recovering Unimpeachable Source, Journalism & Democracy.

April 30, 2001
9:42A
SOUL FOOD

After such a soul-sucking week last week, I had an almost primitive urge to see and touch mother ocean. So, yesterday Honey and I took Highway 84 over the hill and through the redwoods. After a couple of bowls of excellent clam chowder at Cameron's in Half Moon Bay, we headed for San Gregorio Beach. Such a peaceful place. It was all I could do to just sit, watch the waves, and let the sun warm me.

To top it all off, we stopped at a barn and bought the best strawberries I've had since leaving Arkansas. Imagine sweeeet strawberries, the open road, the smell of redwoods, Stevie Ray Vaughan's Couldn't Stand the Weather, blue skies, and Rhonda running like a charm.

When we got home, we dipped some of the strawberries in Scharffen Berger semi-sweet chocolate, and then used the rest for strawberry shortcake which we ate while watching the Sopranos.

It was one of those perfect days that fall into your lap.

So now feeling revived, refreshed, at one with my world, I think I just might live.

April 24, 2001
12:15P
JUST PEACHY

Cheap Thrills: Can you find the peach?

If you happen to drop by Good Vibes while you're in The City today, you'll have to check out Annie Sprinkle's gallery, Sex Bombs and Bombshells.

As other web design avenues dry up, I keep seeing these stories: Porn still profitable and Porn Pays.

Bra: good place for your gun. It's no secret anymore.

Loose lips sink ships. From Betty Dodson's Genital Art Gallery.

If you happen to be in London: The Vagina Monologues.

Internet used as sex aid by women. Ya think?

A directory that I'll have to look into: Really Good Porn for Women.

...I think I'm missing my Heartless outlet... *sigh*

But just to show you that I don't have a one-track mind: find networking events in the Valley

File this under Too Fuckin Funny: The Internet Help Desk. Thanks, Dave!

From Nublog: They're still trying to pigeon-hole the Web masses.

Nice try Michael Dell.

Sadly, ComputerWare is closing. It was always so nice to go into a store that had all Mac stuff and you didn't have to ask 'do they make that for the Mac also?'.